So after 6 and a half blissful years of togetherness, I finally got around to getting one of those "rings" everyone keeps talking about. I even got around to officially asking Regina if she really, truly, actually, in all honesty wanted to spend the rest of this lifetime with boring ol' me. Of course, leave it to me to keep getting in the way of myself when it came time to finally go through with it.
Surprisingly, the part of the whole plan I was most worried about (transporting the ring undetected from east to west coast) actually went off without a hitch. I stored the ring by itself in my digital camera bag's accessory compartment where I keep an extra memory card and USB cable. That way, it could stay on me the whole time and it wouldn't be too suspicious since carrying my camera everywhere on vacation is the norm for me. The box to the ring was tucked inside one of my enormous shoes at the bottom of my suitcase. At one point, airport security actually asked to see inside Regina's bag at MacArthur before we left while mine went through without inspection. Phew! Talk about close call. How memorable would that proposal had been if they asked me to empty the contents of my camera bag? "Um....girlfriend....will you marry me....?" (As we put our shoes back on beyond the metal detectors...)
So, my plan from the start was to propose at the end of our second day of wine tasting in Napa Valley, California. You have to understand....for Regina visiting Napa was the equivalent of a child discovering Santa Claus is real and being offered a chance to go to the North
Pole. Imagine Charlie and the Chocolate Factory...Hell, imagine me in a chocolate factory. It was that big of a deal. But first, we spent two days in San Francisco. And, of course, opportunities abounded for popping the question.
Our first day in San Francisco, after an amazing breakfast at Kate's Kitchen in Haight-Ashbury, we made our way up the peak of Buena Vista park, where you get a breath taking, panoramic view of the city, the bay, and the Golden Gate Bridge. It was perfect. There was a bench. It was sunny. Not a cloud in the sky.
The birds were singing. The ring was right in my pocket.... And then came the dogs. And the joggers. Two locals. And then a trio of German tourists...all within nanoseconds of each other. I was so annoyed. I didn't realize how much I showed it until afterwards when I was explaining to Regina all the different times I was going to propose that she said "oh...I wondered why you were so pissed off suddenly when people started showing up. It all makes sense now" Yeah. Damn those German tourists.
Next opportunity was at dinner that night at an amazing, all-vegetarian restaurant on the waterfront called Greens. She had been looking forward to this place for months. We had booked it way in advance it was definitely lived up to every expectation. Again, the whole romantic-dimly-lit-fancy-dinner vibe was in full effect....but it just didn't feel right. I can't explain it. Maybe it was the number of people around, or the obnoxious lady behind us ruining the mood by explaining her innermost thoughts to everyone in the restaurant....or maybe it was the fact that I would have had to unzip a dorky camera bag and dig for the ring in order to hand it to her since the nice box it was supposed to come in was still tucked in my Steve Maddens at the hotel. For whatever reason, the moment would have to wait.
Which brings us to Napa Valley.
We made our way over the Golden Gate Bridge and to Regina's version of Heaven, where the clouds are actually rolling hills of endless vineyards and instead of harps we get bottles of perfectly aged Zins and Cabs. I have never seen her eyes glass over the way they did as we passed by the "Welcome to Napa!" sign. Seriously...I was actually a bit jealous. I know that sounds weird, but I swear she was having dirty thoughts about an actual region of the world....or at least it's wine. But I digress....
We were able to squeeze in three wineries in our first afternoon there. The third, Artessa, has perhaps the most stunningly designed tasting rooms in all of Napa. It was literally built into the peak of one of the highest ranges in Napa, affording it some of the most breathtaking views of the entire region. We had gotten there just in time for sunset. It was, once again, the perfect time....except for the fact that it was closing time and the security guard was hovering right behind us waiting to lock the balcony door for the night. Now, I'm sure the guy was a nice gentleman and all, but he just didn't quite fit into the picture. Let's just say it was a bit awkward. Again, I was shot down by fate.
Finally came the originally planned D-Day. Day two. The day. I was able to slickly get the ring into its box by feigning the need to use the bathroom before we left the hotel. Just call me Double-O-Dorkwad. We had an amazing adventure throughout the valley, dividing our time between private and public tours and tastings at both small, mom-and-pop vineyards as well as the Mundavis of the region. At any given moment I was ready to spring into action....or so I thought. Towards the end of our day, we rushed over to Frog's Leap, one Regina's biggest targets for the trip, in hopes of getting into one of their tours and tastings despite not having made a reservation. Unfortunately, there was a group of 14 booked for the last tour of the day. However, the wonderfully gracious tour guide Erin not only booked us for the following day, but she offered us each a glass of Chardonnay and invited us to walk the grounds ourselves if we wanted to.
It was a beautiful vineyard with a wonderful little garden you could walk through; a quiet, picturesque landscape where one could envision a wedding taking place....or an engagement...if one were actually thinking. Where my head was at that time I still can't explain, but the thought didn't occur to me until we had gotten back into the car. I think I had gotten so caught up in the idea of doing it at the end of our day that it didn't even register at 3pm to get on one knee and ask the question I've been dying to ask for more than half a decade.
So it came down to the wire, and I was hoping the place we chose for dinner would provide the perfect atmosphere...hell, by this point I was getting less picky about "perfection" and more concerned with asking her before she a) had so much wine that her answer could, in fact, be made under the influence or b) became too tired to even want to stay for an entire meal. We made our way to Yountsville, the center of fine dining in Napa Valley, and chose a place called Hurely's based on Mike Malat's recommendation. The whole evening starts out with us getting seated next to a ridiculously drafty window, causing Regina to visibly shiver within two minutes of sitting down. We ask to be moved and are then graciously escorted immediately to another table....of course this table is now situated between two windows, thus slowly turning the night into a comedic tragedy. Seriously, I was imagining a sitcom laugh track going as the night progressed and I kept clutching the ring in my pocket more and more.
So we begin our meal and now comes the crucial decision of when to do it. Between courses is too risky given the constant flow of bus boys, water-pourers, and our waitress, who will forever be known as Perfect Timing (you'll see why in a bit). Now, waiting until the check is paid is risky too because knowing Regina and how cold she was at that point, she would be up like a shot, getting her coat on and wanting to head to the restroom before our drive back to the hotel. I just didn't want to be like "oh..wait...before you go to the bathroom, I have something to ask you...."
So I decided while we were drinking our coffee would be the time. We get our coffee, the waitress drops the check, and we begin to chat about how this could very-well be the best vacation we have ever taken together.
"Is it the perfect vacation?" I ask slyly as I reach into my pocket undetected and bring the box into my hand.
"It just may be," she replies. "We got to see San Francisco...I'm in Napa Valley...and our trip isn't even half over...."
And before she can say anything else, I place the box in front of her.
She tears up instantly. She knows exactly what was happening. I start to tear up too. My heart is in my ears and I thank God it's dim in there because I know my ears are getting ridiculously red. She opens the box. I swear the glow of the ring hits her eyes and I can see its reflection in them. No words need to be spoken. And then....just then.........
The waitress comes by to see if I had placed anything in the bifold in order to pay the bill.
Like I said...Perfect Timing.
Regina takes one look at her, and in an even-keeled tone that drops the temperature in the room even further, says "we're not ready yet". Seriously, I think the tears in her eyes actually reversed direction for a few seconds and then reappeared once the waitress high-tailed it out of there.
We laughed and continued drinking our coffee as we've done now hundreds of times together. Like I said in the title of this post, it really wasn't much of a question as it was a confirmation. Not that it makes the moment any less important or nerve-wracking (as you can tell from my babbling) but it was a moment only we could have....and for those of you who know us well, it really couldn't have happened any other way....
With that said, I can't even imagine what the story of our wedding is going to sound like......
Keep checking back for details.
Jerry.....and Regina (as editor).